I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
