There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
