Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
