all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
