hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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