let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
