And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
