YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
