i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize