i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
