what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize