Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
