It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
