you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Randomize
