She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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