I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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