This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
