Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
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