careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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