look no pants
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
