Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
My cat gives me a boner
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
