I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
and you said cock pushups were impossible
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I will be naked everywhere
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
whose ass print is on the piano?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Randomize
