he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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