and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
