just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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