your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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