How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
