I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
