What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
