So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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