Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
