left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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