First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
