whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
