You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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