I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she peed on how many people?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
