C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
