I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
