You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
No subtext here. People are naked.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
