wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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