Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
