I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
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