Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
