yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Boobs are out for the taking
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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