Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
