I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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