Non-Jews are for practice
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
