Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
