Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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