Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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